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Reply by Jimmie

25 Apr 2018, 8:47 PM

Hi, Old Bat, dear. Thank you for writng. It sounds like you have had quite a difficullt time. I hope things have improved for you of late.

I have had a difficult time of late as well. My wife, Sarah, died a few weeks ago, the day after my 70th birthday, and a few weeks short of our 47th wedding anniversary. I am in pieces.

Jim

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Reply by oldbat

25 Apr 2018, 10:32 PM

Oh Jimmie, dear, dear Jimmie,

I am writing with a mix of tears and joy. Joy that you actually got in touch. Tears for the sad news about Sarah. What a journey you both shared. And what a blessing, no matter however mixed, that you were together 'til hers ended. 47 years, Jimmie. Years that I'm sure you now look back on with a welter of feelings. Joy. Fear. Hope. Happiness. And sorrow. Such profound sorrow. I only hope that, along with the inevitable tears you feel some leavening from shared memories. Memories that are yours alone. Memories you can take out, time and time again, visit and revisit. Memories you can share or treasure alone.

I am bereft for you. Devastated that I have nothing to offer but the cold comfort of platitudinous words. Please know that they come from my heart. A heart that knows, but cannot possibly share, your sorrow. Much as I wish that I could.

Please, please do keep in touch. I would offer up my per8sonal email here, but am not sure what the CVH rules are at times like this.

I am sure that your friends here will be in touch. You touched so many of us, Jimmie. Your true kindness, your irrepressible wit and undeniable wisdom saw us through so many terrible times. Let us be here for you now.

With deepest respect and affection,

Oldbat

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Reply by Xenia

26 Apr 2018, 2:02 AM

Hello Old Bat:

What a surprise to hear from you! I missed you and all on our web page. I too have reread the messages and many brought me back to all of you. I missed the interaction of morning reads, messageing, etc.

My life has pretty well normal for someone who lost their husband 2 years ago. Of course I told you I had moved twice and am now in a great Independent residence. Lots going on and keeping busy except the arthritis which keeps rearing its head. Get shots every 90 days so that keeps me going.

I will take time tomorrow to write my past goings on as I am somewhat tired to-day. Had my shots and they make me tired.

Thanks so much for reopening contact. I missed you all so very much.

Hugs to all.

Xenia

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Reply by NatR

26 Apr 2018, 2:06 AM

Dear Oldbat and all readers

somehow we all fell off the map, but I have thought about you all over the past months. it was a time for focussing on my own health, and I never forgot about the Gang. I am glad that you are still out there.
winter was long and it seems more than a couple of us just hunkered down. I am sorry okdbat that you felt abandoned - I am sorry I didn’t write more - I am glad you gave us a nudge and I hope you feel better knowing we are still here

hang in there, it sounds like a big change in your life and routine, I hope you feel better soon. You have given until you needed to take care of yourself

I hope everyone checks in

summer is just around the corner - but here in northern Ontario we are still getting snowfalls ( tiny ones) but it’s been chilly!!
The seagulls and other birds are finding their way back home, the brown grass is showing its ibmgly face but it will soon turn green

tge sand from a long winter of ice and snow is gritty and hangs onto our shoes - and the best part of spring is lengthening days

hope renews is, good to hear from Oldbat and hope more will answer
Xenia - you have also crossed my mind - everyone here Jimmy , Jenn and all

wushinv you a good evening strength for tomorrow
hugs 🤗
natR

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Reply by Xenia

26 Apr 2018, 2:10 AM

Dear Jimmie:

How wonderful to hear from you but saddened at the loss of your beloved wife Sarah. Your loss is felt by all of us on this web site. You have been the staunch supporter of many of us and now we offer you our support and love to help you through these trying times.

I feel your loss that Sarah passed just before your wedding anniversary much the same as for John and myself. John passed away 5 days before our 59th wedding anniversary. We had hoped to share this time together but it was not to be but as you I am thankful for all they years we shared. Many days are bitter sweet and empty but I carry on as we must and fill my days with thoughts of our years together.

As I shared with Old Bat I will be in touch shortly (tomorrow) as I am a bit under the weather having had shots and treatments for my arthritis and will be able to type easier in the morning.

I carry you in my thoughts and have missed the comradere we shared with all on this web site and trust we will re unite and keep in touch once more.

My deepest condolances to you on the loss of your wife Sarah .

Xenia

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Reply by NatR

26 Apr 2018, 2:12 AM

Jim, my condolences to you on your loss, I am so sorry - I hope that each day you keep on taking care of yourself.. it’s hard to lose your partner. I hope you can take things one day at a time

sorry for my absence as well
sending my thoughts ❤️
NatR

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Reply by Nouce

26 Apr 2018, 10:36 AM

Greetings, all,

Jimmie, I send you my love and condolences. My Pablo died in February, and my life has been a blur of weeping and responsibilities since then.

I'm so glad to reconnect. I'm moving this weekend to a much smaller home, and there is a lovely redbud tree blooming outside the front door. Pablo planted one for me at the old home, so it will be a loving connection every time I come home.

Love to all,

Nouce

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Reply by NatR

26 Apr 2018, 3:02 PM

Hello Nouce
my sympathies to you as well
somehow this winter was overwhelming for our little group and I am glad to see you are carrying on despite your loss
I think that’s the toughest part of life - the loss of loved ones, the struggle to move forward on a path that seems so lonely
I send you my thoughts and hope that your move is as easy as possible
I love the story about the tree and your husband - yes it’s little reminders of those who mattered most, that help us carry on
stnfung you some of my sunshine ☀️ today.
hugs
NatR 🤗

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Reply by KathCull_admin

26 Apr 2018, 3:36 PM

Hello everyone,
How lovely to hear all your voices again. I am sending warm hugs to you all - to you Nouce and Jimmie as you navigate the 'alone' road since Pablo and Sarah died; to you Xenia as you continue on without John; Oldbat in your sadness; NatR as you work out life in your corner of the world.

From time to time now (it's been 2 1/2 years since Henry died) I feel that 'loneliness' that cannot be erased by people, company or activity. I don't feel it's something that needs to be 'fixed' but acknowledeged as being there. It is so good for me to know that I know you are all out there - my friends, companions on the road. I hope you know that you may not hear from me, we may not see each other but you are like the Warren Zevon song lyrics (I am adjusting the focus a little bit) tied to me like the buttons on my blouse. Here's the lyrics... Keep me in your heart for awhie

I have stayed in my house - although the little tug of war goes on - stay or move to an apartment. My (our:) daughter is getting married in June in Guatemala - I will have a son -in-law whom I love. I have had the chance to travel - one of Henry's requests was that I travel. I have made new friends and am thankful for old ones.

Take care dear friends of the Who Advocates for Me Club!

Katherine

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Reply by KathCull_admin

26 Apr 2018, 3:38 PM

Dear Oldbat - I meant to thank you for reviving the thread - I hope you know the power you have in your words (as you have for much of your life) to bring caring to others. Thank you
K

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